I was pretty pumped to get this one because if any one know’s the importance of a good play list, it’s me.  I have a few too many jobs, a family to spend time with, meals to cook; honestly my head is spinning just thinking of the list of things I do.  Working out is always near the top on my list of priorities because without it I know my energy and everything else will suffer.  That said, I can only fit it in by getting up before dawn and the only thing that will get me going at that hour is music.  When I peel myself out of bed and drive to the gym, it isn’t until I put in my ear buds that I come alive.

It is as much the playlist as it is the actual workout that I look forward to.  The workout playlist for me needs to make me feel tough, sexy (yes, squats and dead lifts are sexy) and ready to move.  My time in the gym is the one hour of the day where I get to be a superhero and leave anything I’m struggling with behind.  The music sets the tone and provides the soundtrack.

For me, the order of a playlist is an important as the songs. Since this is for a morning workout I have them arranged in such a way that I ease into the workout and then rev up.

The Current Playlist:
Crush On You – Lil’ Kim  (This song is just enough time for me to do a warm up and ease into the idea that I’m gonna get it on)

Ayy Ladies – Travis Porter  (Ok, so indulgently I love this song because it says “bad b—–” …’Come on!)

Talk That Talk – Rihanna  (Sexy and powerful and just enough up tempo to keep up the pace)

Did It On ‘Em – Nicki Minaj  (This song is all about being the top of your game)

The Motto – Drake  (This song never fails to keep me going — and this is about the point that I’m usually thinking of being done)

Rumor Has It – Adele  (I love Adele more than anything, this is another strong female voice… it’s my favorite push up song!)

Work Out For Me – J. Cole  (Because obviously)

Stylish Clothes – Get Busy Committee  (This could easily be any of the GBC’s songs, they are all upbeat, funny and have great moving bass lines to keep you moving)

99 Problems – Jay-Z  (Jay-Z is always the indicator to me that I’m almost done which transitions into…)

Gone Baby Don’t Be Long – Erykah Badu  (BADU!  For stretching.  Always.  When this song comes on I know it’s time for sweating, glowing and stretching out my aching muscles.  Favorite part of the day.  Hands down.)

The Sweetest Thing – Fugees  (As time allows I just lay on the floor and listen to this song.  If you don’t know it, do yourself a favor and download it.  It’s so sweet and enchanting and breathing through this song gives me the focus I need for the rest of the day.)

Now here is the cool part: You can win prizes from Sargento today! Just upload a photo of your new playlist to the sargento facebook page to win!  Be sure to tell me when you do!  I always need new ideas!

xoxo,

Mama

I spent the whole day crying the first time I left my kiddo in someone else’s care for an entire day. Turns out: she was fine.

Mothering is a challenging job. It’s terrifying actually. It’s a huge job. And in some ways if you aren’t a little terrified at the magnitude of the calling you might not realize how big it is. But starting with the actual labor and delivery we are silenced. It’s “gross” to talk about birth. Unsavory to nurse in mixed company and completely unacceptable to have a bad day with your child and admit it.

Well fuck that.

This is some seriously challenging stuff here. And there are about a billion ways to do it well and none of them will get you a standing ovation from everyone.

**Being a father is also a very challenging job, however (in my experience) Dad’s get parades thrown in their honor for changing diapers and Mothers… well not so much.**

So this Mother’s day throw yourself a freaking parade. You have successfully kept your child alive for (insert appropriate years here). You have done your best. You have learned, sometimes through trial and error how to better parent the wee one for whom you are responsible. And both (or all) of you have made it to another day of getting to be a family.

Kiss your kiddo. Pat yourself on the back. Forgive yourself for not completely loving every moment, everyday. It’s not unreasonable to be having feelings other than complete love and devotion when your toddler is throwing themselves on the floor over an apple juice for the third time in the hour when all you are trying to accomplish is a single load of dishes. No one likes that. You’re doing great.

You’re doing fantastic actually.

Consider this Mother’s day your parenting new years. So if you would like to improve some aspect of your relationship with your child, set yourself a little goal in that direction. But mostly realize you aren’t alone here. We all secretly know how hard this is and how badly we want someone to tell us we’re getting something right.

Well I’m telling you. You’re rockin it Mama.

Happy Mothers day. Your job is huge and hard and worth every painstaking/challenging/trying/difficult moment.

Take care of you. You’re doing great.

xoxo,
Mama

All the beautiful princesses

My daughter has amazing hair.  She looks like a bi-racial Shirley Temple and every one and their Mother must cross entire grocery stores to comment.  Lola is initially pretty shy and ever since she was a wee baby complete strangers have not been able to help but approach us to talk about her beautiful curls.    It drives her nuts.

Recently we had my daughter’s hair cut.  I don’t know why it’s so important to my husband that she has them more frequently than even I do, but he does take her hair care very seriously.  I had a hair stylist friend coming over to do my hair so I asked if she would mind cutting Lo’s as well.  I knew Lola wouldn’t want one.  She wants “long hair like a princess.”  So I gave her the whole shpeil about cutting the ends so it will grow long and healthy and referred to the hair cut as a “princess haircut.”

Mind you, I didn’t provide her with the princess ideal.  We took the gender neutral toy approach, buying her trucks, tools and items from the “blue isle” at the store.  We don’t label things “boy things” and “girl things” and make sure to always clarify that some boys like what she calls girl things and vice versa.  I married a feminist.  We are that household.  But we also don’t keep things from her and call them bad, because we believe that forbidding things could make them more desirable.  In any case, my daughter, so far, has turned out to be a baby dolls, sparkles and princesses girl.  And I’m into nurturing what she loves.

So we get the hair cut.  My thoughtful friend brought over some hello kitty hair clips to give Lola when she was finished and Lo went skipping off to check out her new hair.  She took one look in the mirror and burst into tears.  ”Something’s not right Mommy…”  she said with her lip quivering “…the curls are still here… I’m not like a princess.”

*This is the part where I literally have to pause from writing to let out a big sigh and hold back my own tears.”

A quarter century ago I was just about her age when I took a knife to my wrist because I thought I was too fat to realize my dream to be a ballerina.  I didn’t cut.  I don’t think I had any intention of doing so.  But I knew that was something people did when they didn’t like themselves, and I did not like myself.  My thighs jiggled unlike the other girls when we leapt across the dance class and my dreams felt completely out of reach.  I was four.

While that is a sad story it’s the long-term implications that are more startling.  It was never my body that was the problem (I was an average sized kid at that point).  It was how I felt about it.  And those feelings lead to a variety of unhealthy and risky behaviors.  Cliff’s notes: disordered eating, crash dieting, abusive relationships, depression and a slew of high risk behaviors, all fueled by this same self-hatred.  Self esteem is not some new agey bullshit we all just need to stop tripping off of, it’s the very value we place on our own existence.

THE reason I started working out and eating healthfully (and learning how to do both of those things) is because I wanted to pass those habits on to my daughter.  Because the only women I knew who didn’t constantly berate themselves for the shape of their bodies were athletes.  They didn’t abuse their bodies because they needed them to perform.  They didn’t beat themselves up at the scale because they were focused on what their bodies could do. And while I realize there are many athlete women who also struggle with these issues as well, I knew the best way to help my daughter have a positive body image and a healthy lifestyle was to role model both.  And that’s what I set out to do (which lead to 90lbs weight loss, starting this business and becoming a health food/exercise nut but began) with the following goals….

1.  I never, ever, ever speak negatively about my body (or another’s) to my daughter. I really don’t often do this anyway.  When she’s older I intend to share with her how I deal with insecurities when they pop up, but for now it’s body positive all the time.  Little girls learn primarily from their Mothers to not like their bodies.  Not magazines.  I have the hands down best mother in the entire world, who like most women, has for as long as I can remember been on a diet.  I grew up with weight watchers meals, diet everything and a Mother who spoke harshly of her body and belittled herself if she ate “bad foods.”  While she would have never said anything to me about my body and was never anything but completely encouraging to me, it was my observation of her behaviors that taught me mine.  If I am half the Mother my Mom was, Lola will be so fortunate but that is the one legacy I am ending here.

2.  We eat healthy food at home. As the primary grocery shopper/meal planner/cook at my house I have control over the food that enters my home.  And we eat good.  I cook up a storm most nights of the week and it’s all clean eating, mostly vegetable based, whole foods.  If we go out to eat or Lola is with someone else I do not police her diet.  I control what is eaten at my home and I worry less about what she eats “sometimes.”  Even if she isn’t interested in what we are eating I know that she is learning how to cook and eat from what I do and I feel good about that.

3.  We don’t make a big fuss over food. We eat the foods we eat.  There are vegetables and usually fruit on every plate.  If she doesn’t eat it we don’t make her.  My husband has been successful lately with getting her to eat veggies by giving her a small portion of something we know she likes with a small portion of vegetables and letting her have seconds when she finishes what’s on her plate.  I don’t want to teach her to be obsessive over foods or make eating her greens some battle of the wills.  I make food.  It’s healthy and I serve it to my family.  It’s not a big ordeal.

4.  We educate her about food and exercise. It’s not like I sit her down for an hour every morning and explain the importance of HIIT vs steady state cardio, it’s much simpler and more natural than that.  When I take her to the gym I talk about how working out is one way I take care of my body.  I talk about how it makes me feel good and helps me be fast and strong.  She likes to walk around the gym with me and identify the kinds of equipment there.  We do the same thing with food, explaining what the food does for us as well as making sure she knows what all the produce is in the grocery store.  It’s become kind of a game even, I let her find all the produce on my list for me.  This way she is learning and eating healthy/exercise are just a normal part of her life and not something that is emphasized as “good vs bad” or something Mommy does to “fix herself.”

5.  We talk about what our bodies can do. I tell Lola when I ran faster than the last time.  I tell her when I felt strong during a workout.  She gets up during dinner sometimes to show me how fast her vegetables are making her.  We talk about how strong she is.  When we talk bodies we talk about how cool they are.  As she’s getting older we will start enrolling her in activities that she is interested in that are physical (as well as creative or intellectual) that she is interested in.  Right now she has taken interest in ballet and karate so we will start there.  But it won’t be about being a particular size or shape but rather about finding things she enjoys that keep her active and develop body awareness and confidence.

6.  I tell her she is beautiful every damn day. I also tell her she is smart, funny and creative.  I tell her I’m proud of her.  I tell her she’s my favorite in the whole world.  And I tell her she is beautiful.  Because she is.   I believe all women are beautiful and am not into the thinking that “only insides count.”  My thinking is this; we are whole people, insides and outsides, and I refuse to reject any part of my daughter as being less important or trivial and to be ignored.  So I tell her she’s brilliant.  I tell her she’s hilarious.  I tell her she’s good at all the things she’s good at.  And I tell her she’s beautiful.  Every damn day.

So here we are 3.5 years in and already have a girl baby in tears over her hair being “wrong.”  I don’t know if it’s all the uncomfortable attention it brings her or if it really is just that the images of princesses she idolizes have straight hair but my response was swift.

I ran to my baby to listen to why she was upset.  I reflected back what I was hearing (princesses don’t have curly hair) and ran to do a google search of “princesses with curly hair.”  I then loudly gasped “Look at all these beautiful princesses!”  Lola marveled at all the curls and wanted to scroll through them on her own.

My husband points out “beautiful princesses” wherever we go.  He shows her a diverse cross-section of every type of woman (easy for him, he also believes all women to be beautiful).  And often comments upon coming home about “all the beautiful princesses” they saw that day.  So far we seem to have successfully dodged the great hair issue of Spring 2012.

I have known from the beginning I cannot possibly shelter her from the whole world, that images and notions of what is acceptable and beautiful will get to her.  I know that it is highly likely, if not inevitable that she too will struggle with issues of self-worth and body negativity.  I only hope to be a positive role model through it and to do everything I can to build a strong foundation to her self-esteem.

I want so much for her.  I want to give her the world but I also want her to earn it.  I want to keep her from every hurt but I also know that those bumps and bruises make for stronger character.  I just love her so much it hurts, and while I know she will have her own journey my gift to her is this:

A Mother who takes care of herself, who uses exercise as a coping skill to deal with stress and generally feel good.  A household filled with healthy foods and the knowledge of what they do and how to prepare them.  A role model who rejects every standard of beauty in order to see it all around and in her mirror.  Years upon years of positive messages about all the parts of her.  And we read every day “**I like myself! I’m glad I’m me. There’s no one else I’d rather be. I like my eyes, my ears, my nose. I like my fingers and my toes…  I like me on the inside, too, for all I think and say and do…  No matter if they stop and stare, nobody ever anywhere, can make me feel that what they see is all there really is to me.”

Love,

Imperfect Mama

**Excerpt from “I like Myself” by Karen Beaumont

I have those moments, sitting on the couch at the end of a long day in a tank top that feels like it fit different last month, where I look down and go “hello belly.”  It happens.  Turning over a new leaf and gaining new perspective does not mean I love every inch of me every day.  It also doesn’t mean I prioritize having a six pack.  *I have never had a six pack.*

What it does mean is that I don’t let these inevitable moments rule my mind or my life.  I tell the voice that is bemoaning my belly to fuck off.  And I always consider the appearance and abilities of my body objective.  Not emotional.  Because it’s much simpler that way.  And it is objective.

If I have gained weight or body fat it has been a result of food and exercise choices.  Not because I’m a shitty person.  It has no bearing on my worth and does not have to impact my self esteem.  It is what it is.  And likewise if I have to slimmed down, added muscle, cut a minute off my mile time… whatever, I have chosen to do so.  It’s choices.

It’s also good to bear in mind that my scale is also telling me things like what time of day it is, if I need to pee, what part of my cycle I’m on and countless other stupid details that I don’t have control over.  But regardless of those variables, the fit of my tank top and the number on the scale no longer determine my mood, feelings about myself or my own determined worth.  And while I promise I understand completely those feelings, the sooner you begin to separate the normal fluctuations of your  body based on things both in and out of your control from your worth, the easier it is to both take control of your body and just enjoy your life.

To lose 90lbs in a year I had to be dedicated.  I constantly set performance goals and achieved them.  I consumed healthy foods constantly and in proper portions.  I was all over it.  And it felt amazing.  I exercised a lot and with the determination of a beast.  And when I’m in beast mode, it’s a serious situation.

To maintain my weight I don’t have to be so conscious.  Due to having drastically changed my mindless habits (never cream with coffee, lots of water, lots of vegetables, whole foods blah blah) as well as regularly exercising (including serious strength training) for the last 3 years my metabolism affords me to be lax sometimes.  And sometimes I am.  Fuck it.

Now I’m not saying that you have to feel this way.  There are people who live and breathe fitness.  I think that’s amazing.  I’m not currently one of those people.  (Though many people would say working out 5 days a week and eating as much produce as I do would make me one of those, I’m here to tell you sometimes I take many days off in a row and eat ice cream.  It’s true.)

The point is: there are lots of ways to do this.  Whether you want to lose weight, gain strength, be healthier, get faster, whatever your goal; you don’t have to run ultra marathons and measure out your protein intake everyday.  You can eat ice cream.  You can take an impromptu rest day because your kids wanted to go to the park.  And to keep a nice perspective on all this, you have to buck up and tell the critical voice it’s ridiculous.  You need to decide that you have wasted enough time feeling badly about your body and quickly move away from those stupid thoughts.  You have to realize that the level of your dedication will result in the body you have and then make choices accordingly.

So I love exercise but some days when I am working 12-14 hours I chose sleeping in.  I eat spinach like it’s going out of style but I don’t always turn down peanut butter cookies and when my choices result in a small change in performance of curvature it doesn’t ruin my life.  In fact, it doesn’t even ruin my moment.

How bout that?  How about fuck it?

My concern is not my thighs.  I’m good with my thighs.  Sometimes they are tighter revealing some bad ass muscle from all the hours spent squating, dead lifting and lunging and sometimes they have a little extra juiciness to them.  I want to live a full life.  I want to be healthy enough to run for an hour if I want to, keep up with my kiddo and not be self conscious in my clothes.  I also want to have a cream puff here and there and give myself permission to take a day off from the gym even if it wasn’t my scheduled rest day.

So find the “balance” that works for you accept the body that affords.  This is objective.  And as far as that nagging, critical voice in your head?  Just keep practicing telling it where it can go and it gets quieter all the time.

Fuck it.

Love, Mama

A healthy intake of food and effective exercise works.  It’s actually an objective science and not a mean trick God or the universe is just playing on you.

AND…

100% of the people who have said this to me (including myself) have actually not tried everything, but rather felt like they had because they worried so much about it.

Allow me to explain.  When I was overweight I was constantly thinking about my weight, other people’s weight, what I should be eating, what I shouldn’t eat, how I should exercise etc, etc, etc.  I “tried” diets.  Mostly ones I made up.  But I thought about them all the time.  I “tried” working out.  Sometimes for whole weeks!  But “trying” wasn’t a lasting scenario, I did not commit myself to anything for a long period of time.  What I did was stress about it.  And in my mind, I equated stressing about it with putting my energy into doing something about it.  This is not the same thing.

Eating a healthy diet in proper portion sizes and exercising effectively and consistently works.  It works.  It’s objective.

The trouble is most people don’t know how to do either of those things.  And with good reason.  There are gigantic international companies devoted to cramming misinformation down our throats about what comprises a healthy food choice, what exercise you must do, or even better- what pills you must take to be fit, thin and ultimately happy.  It wasn’t until I committed to getting healthy that I actually took the time to do my research about what healthy food/portion sizes were and began to push myself to exercise 5-6 days a week that I began to see changes in my body.

Some of those changes came fast.  I would see lots of weight loss one week and be at a stand still for weeks on end.  But because I was committed and knew I was making healthy choices (which was my goal to begin with) I had faith that my body would eventually change and kept moving forward.  And it did.  It still does.

Think about it like this: we are animals.  We are meant to hunt and gather.  Our bodies are supposed to be active for survival.  And there are foods that our bodies are meant to eat.  But our lives look nothing like that anymore.   Most of us don’t eat food even our grandmother’s grew up with and we certainly don’t spend our days moving for survival.  So we have to re-learn what our bodies need and compensate for all the cubicle/couch sitting with some serious moving around!

And it works.  It just does.  You are not the exception.

I’m sorry if this seems harsh.  But the problem with the mantra “I’ve tried everything, but nothing works” is that it’s self defeating.  It serves no purpose for you.  And hopefully if you can be honest with yourself about it you can move forward and achieve your personal health goals.  But it takes gaining a new education about healthy lifestyle choices, making lots of new habits and committing yourself to the changes.  Completely.  Forever.  And that certainly doesn’t mean you can’t ever take breaks from exercise or enjoy non healthy foods, but it does mean that those will no longer be a part of your routine.

Here is the super amazing news: it’s so worth it.  I don’t live a life of deprivation but I did relearn how to cook and how to eat.  I don’t run all day everyday but I do workout 5-6 days a week and over time began to love it (which my old self would have thought was completely nuts and for crazy people).  And I cannot tell you how much more full my life is because of it.  Not because I have smaller pants.  My smaller pants do not make me a happy person with a full life.  But because I no longer have self defeating mantras.  I don’t spend any time stressing about how I look, what to wear, how I need to “fix” myself or if I’m good enough.  In terms of my health I feel strong, I have more energy and the work I put in, not the weight loss resulted in confidence I’ve never had.  I don’t feel stuck in my body and understand that if I gain a little weight it’s a result of my choices and I know how to adjust if I choose.

Most importantly my weight no longer has me sitting on the sidelines.

I was at a carnival with my daughter this last spring and they had a huge moonwalk/slide thing that she wanted to go down.  It was a little steep for my wee one so I decided to go with her.  It was a blast.  When we were finished sliding, jumping, and playing my Mom said to me, “I bet that’s something you would have never felt comfortable doing before.”  I hadn’t even thought about that.  But there are so many ways I play and interact with my child that would have made me feel overwhelmingly self-conscious before.  I would have never climbed up an inflatable slide with my 240lb behind.  And I can’t even tell you what it means to me that my daughter has a Mommy who is physically able to play with her.  It’s a big deal.

Which is why I’m not sorry for ruining your mantra if it’s yours.  You haven’t tried everything, and healthy living works.  And you deserve so much more from life than feeling trapped in your body and stressing about it all the time.  You can have better.  And you are worthy of it.

xoxo, Mama

• 5 ish Ice Cubes
• 1 banana
• 1/2 c Oatmeal
• 1 t cinnamon
• 3 drops Liquid Vanilla Stevia
• 1/4 c Grated Carrot
• 1 scoop Vanilla Protein Powder
• 1 T Carob Powder
• 1 c Milk (I use rice) or Double Chocolate Yerba Mate’ (for energy!)

I didn’t even taste this til I was out the door with it in hand (which is the exact reason I do smoothies so often, I can enjoy them on the go!)  Had no idea if it would be gross or amazing.  Turns out it was completely amazing.  Grating carrots can be a bitch but I just stick em in the food processor at the beginning of the week and have them in the fridge ready to go.  Liquid stevia and carob powder both run about 5 bucks but last forever and are nice alternatives to chocolate and sugar.  I also brew a whole pitcher of yerba mate’ once a week for smoothies.  This stuff may seem like a lot of work but I spend about 5 minutes doing smoothie prep for the week and another 5 every time I have one.  5 minutes is for sure an amount of time I’m willing to spend making sure I’m eating something good.  And, let’s be real, it takes LONGER than 5 minutes to hit up the drive thru!

Enjoy!

Mama

For the average gal to get washboard abs would require a lot of time spent exercising and a super clean diet.  I’m not saying you can’t be happy doing those things.  In fact doing those things actually does make for a happy person, endorphins and proper nutrition does a lot for your mood!  But if you aren’t willing to do all of that, maybe you’re more in the daily walks and getting some veggies in mode, I think that’s okay too.  And if that’s the case then maybe your “happy weight” is not the number you initially had in mind or at least not yet.

For me, when I started my “fitness journey” I had a number in mind for the scale.  I began with focusing on 5lbs at a time, but when I got smaller and smaller I got kind of addicted to the scale.  It was so fun watching the numbers go down, but was equally discouraging when it didn’t budge.  And then I had this elusive number in mind that I hit once.  Probably after taking a shit and before drinking water for the day.  It has never happened again.  My “happy weight” for me is about 5-10lbs above that number.  And it’s based on the number my scale usually lands at when I’m hitting it hard at the gym (which I’m totally into), seeing strength gains (which makes me super happy), running fast (like a bad ass) and eating 80% clean.

My goals may change.  I never rule anything out, so perhaps one day I will set my sights on a figure competition, or just revealing the abs I know are under this slight “protective coating” I’ve got going on.  But for now, as long as I’m feeling strong and healthy, I’m happy with my weight.  The last 10lbs (down 5 if you’re following) is just to get back to my happy place.  I know I could be faster and stronger, and that I feel better when I am, so I’m working back there.  My current “happy weight” doesn’t involve a six pack, and isn’t based on what I weighed before puberty or what I read Cameron Diaz weighs.  It’s all about the happy.  Not about the fantasy number.

I hope this doesn’t come across as asking you to settle.  If you are set on complete transformation and ever shrinking, or need to lose weight for health reasons– go get that shit girl!  But consider that whatever you do to get there has to be things that make you happy or they won’t stick.  And they have to be things you are willing to do- well, always.

Set some goals.  Set goals that meeting will make you proud.  Walk or run your first 5k.  Eat more spinach.  Try some healthier recipes out on your family.  Notice how these changes make you feel and keep going.  And then just see what happens with your body.  You happy weight might even be smaller than you initially had in mind, and it may be higher.  (And it may be higher while you are actually much smaller).

So while you are striving to be the best you, please shoot for the best you that will make you happy.  I promise hardly eating doesn’t result in lasting weight loss (esp bc you’ll be losing muscle which isn’t probably the cute you’re going for) and it certainly doesn’t result in happy.  Catch me on a day I’ve been a poor care taker of my body and rushed around so much I didn’t eat and you will meet one unhappy bitch.

A happy weight is just that, a weight that makes you happy.  Numbers can sometimes help give you focus, but health and happiness are what sustain you.  Not being 120lbs.  (Or whatever).

Figure out your happy.  And worry most of all about happy.

xoxo,

Mama

That said, you have to keep your goals in mind.  If you are trying to train for a figure competition, now is not the time to indulge.  But the way that I keep my indulgences from going over board is by indulging WELL.  I’m talkin- screw the microwave meal, the kind of stale cookies, the last bites of my kid’s mac n cheese.  Bring me the super good stuff.

If you are going to do it, plan it, do it within reason, and do it right.  This kind of occasional splurge keeps me from losing sight of my goals and from feeling like everyone else gets to eat cake and not me.

This also plays into my finances well, because eating produce and a largely vegetarian diet (I don’t advocate vegetarianism regarding this as a personal choice) is pretty damn inexpensive. And meat eater or no, eating a vegetarian meal with a plant based protein is good for your pocketbook and your body.  So while you are saving money, if you are going to splurge you might as well actually do it.

Which brings me to a lovely splurge give away.  Ghirardelli sent me some of their new chocolates from their extra splurgy delicious line.

If you want to make one your special splurge of the moment.  Hit me up in the comments, tell me about how you indulge and I’ll select a winner at random Friday February  3 and I’ll send you some delicious.  Because I believe in doing your squats, eating your greens and sometimes eating the damn chocolate.  And on those occasions, doing it right!

Xoxo, Erin

Woah, Mama!  You lost me with all that shit.

Well in fairness, this is the level of activity that makes me happy.  90lbs ago I would’ve laughed at that last statement.  And pre-Mommyhood I would’ve told you I was way too busy for that.  But if it’s a priority, you will make it happen.  I have two jobs and very little child care.  And I get it in.

That said, you don’t have to do all of that.  So where should you begin?

Some of my favorite, free (to almost free) workouts are as follows:

1) Bodyrock.tv  – this is a website that posts free workouts almost daily.  They look super intense and hard (because they are) but they are totally modifiable.  So don’t run away at the sight of all the amazing abs, watch the videos and wait til the end when they show beginner modifications.  It’s really, really great stuff.

2) 30 day shred – this is a Jillian Micheals dvd you can find at Target for about 9 bucks and less on ebay.  They are 20 minute workouts that can be done with 5lb dumbbells.  The idea is to use it as a 30 day program (there are 3 levels, 3 workouts to work up to).  It’s tough and will make you feel strong as you see improvements in your performance.

3) Running!  It took me forever to call myself a runner.  I was of the “run when chased” variety when I started.  A friend showed me this training plan in a magazine and I thought I’d give it a shot.  It starts with one minute of running.  That minute took me a whole week to be able to do.  Same year I ran my first half marathon.  You can run.

4) Library dvds – the library has a ton of workout dvds.  And I live in small town Kansas.  I don’t do a ton of home workouts anymore (I kind of love the gym) but when I did I just rotated those bad boys.  Belly dancing one day, dirty dancing choreography the next.  Kept me moving.  Half priced books is another good resource.

5) bodybuilding.com – This website is a great resource for training plans and nutrition tips.  Don’t shy away because you don’t want to look like a body builder.  They know their stuff.

Pick something.  Let your plan freak you out a little bit.  If you aren’t uncomfortable you probably aren’t growing. And then do it!  Every damn day (except for at least one rest day a week).  If what you pick is challenging in a way that you find discouraging – keep at it.  Consider that a starting point that gives you lots of room for improvement.

Making exercise a part of your life isn’t hard, you just have to do it.   Decide it’s important and follow through.  You can do this.  Decide you are important enough to do it for.

Lose it with me!  Mama

First of all, while 10lbs is a reasonable goal, I know that isn’t motivation enough for me.  So I have to set some concrete fitness goals to get there.  So I’m going to start running again.  And I found a half marathon in April (OZ marathon, Olathe, KS) which is about 14 weeks out.

A great place to start with a weight loss goal is to find another goal to help you get there.  Scales are assholes and it’s really important to set a goal that isn’t determined entirely by a heartless number machine.  If you are brand spankin new, finding a 5k to walk/trot/whatever would be great.  Plus real life finish lines feel sooo good and therapeutic.

Now you need a training plan.  I’m following this one. I’ll be starting this the final week of January.  A quick google search will find you any kind of plan you are looking for.

Next you need a food plan.  For simplicity I’m starting with two green monsters a day.  Snacks of plain greek yogurt with frozen berries and raw almonds.  And one healthy meal a day.  I will post the recipes I’m using on Facebook.  But you can also follow me on pinterest for recipe ideas. *Note not all of my recipes pinned are healthy, a girl’s gotta have a cookie sometimes too.*

I will keep you posted as to my progress and answer any questions you have as we go along.  If you are joining me, let me know!